The Bullshit Bulletin #4 – #LPRTG #SSRTG #NSFW

Well, it’s already been a weird month. Tuesday I released three books in a day, Dump The Futa President (Making America Great Again, Ese), Romancing the Hot Stone, and The Nose. I’m also about to drop a Steak and BJ Day Bundle. I had to get in on the Trump Parody craze but ended up writing an attack of American Politics in general, not specifically against Trump. I guess I relate to Trump supporters in the sense that they, like Sanders supporters, think the system is so fucked up it needs a jolt. We just don’t remotely agree what the jolt should be. Anyway, I don’t want to get into a political debate, I just had to hop on the bandwagon and smutpunk the shit out of the presidential parody.

Callie Press, who also dropped a presidential parody called [amazon text=Tonguing Tromp&asin=B01BJ7OSLO], is on the verge of completing her very creative Erotic Pulp, which I can’t wait to read.

Regarding the names, Callie went with Domald Tromp. I went with Tronald Dump. She went with Clitin. I stole Kat Crimson’s Clitskin.

SmutpunkButtonR.B. O’Brien was a guest on the Blog Tour Bus Stop. It’s was always going to be hard to top Linzi Basset’s interview, the Nabokov of Erotica but RB did a great job and got a lot of comments, which is cool. R.B. was also a good sport about answering questions such as what’s your stance on getting dick pics and do you write naked on a dildo’d chair.

Check out lots of great writing at

Don’t forget to stay up to date with Milked by the Yeti at

You haven’t heard of MILKED BY THE YETI? Do you live under a rock? Well, get yourself a quick one-minute taste at’s trailer of Natasha and Lena in Milked by the Yeti.Please give it a thumbs up if you enjoyed it. Thank you. I made it, so I could really use the encouragement.

Click the Butt Plug to Visit the Book Page

The SMUTPUNK lexicon is being edited now as you read. That promises to be noteworthy. If you have any words to add, please let me know.

Emme Hor put out a new book with my crappy editing. It’s called Romance on Rollerskates. If you love butt plugs then this is a MUST-READ. You should read it even if you don’t like butt plugs but you’re simply interested in Malaysian (sex) culture. There are mosques, roller skates, and kopi tarik (stretched Malay-style coffee, yum). There’s an alpha male, I think he’s a billionaire, I forget, and a hot little Chindian-Malay sex pot. There’s always a sex pot, isn’t there? It features a facial, anal, and rollerskating. What’s not to love?

SMUTPUNK is new but gaining a bit of steam. Hopefully, we will get some more traction going forward.

Remember to notice that the HEART SHAPED ASS is just an ass upside down (see right if in doubt).

Happy Valentine’s Day, Everyone!

Of course you already know that July Cumming (the dungeon doctor) is awesome. If you need a reminder or have been living under a dirty rock, then check out her exxxcerpts on the MJ site.

It’s your last chance to get a Valentine’s Day Poem written for you. I wrote two poems for Sherri Clark, who you may know as the Ardent Rose. Click the link to her name to have a look. If you want one, hire me now before it’s too late!

Take advantage of this great service:

Poet for hire is always a good thing, right? I suggest you buy the ever-popular hate poem. The poem is emailed anonymously to anyone you choose and features nasty, MJ-style abuse. Great for ex-husbands, bosses, cunt family members, and nemeses. Buy today, guaranteed delivery on Valentine’s Day (plan ahead)!

Sarchashmo is the poet for hire. He’ll cockslap any fools into submission. If he cannot, he’ll employ the help of his “friend”, Queen Kegel the Sextacular

Got something important to add?

Let me know.

I’m always around. Email, comment, tweet, or stop me on the street (grabbing me by the balls is the best way to get my wandering attention).

‘Nuff said, says San Esperma di Desgracia