Interview with July Cumming

How many words do you try to write a day?
Ugh, that’s the first question you ask me? Fucker. I’m slacking. I’d be good with 1000 a day, but I’m lucky if I get anything out. As soon as I find my mojo, I’ll get shit done.

What device do you work on?
Ahh, a crappy, laggy 5-year-old PC.

Can I cum in the crack of your ass while you write?
At the moment, no. I slipped on ice after karaoke and landed smack down on my plump ass. Yeah, it should’ve cushioned the blow, but the pain is real. Bending over isn’t as pleasant as it should be since it wasn’t in the right spot. My knees are good though!

I guess head will have to do. Have you ever gotten head while writing?
In what fantasy world do you live in? Is that an option? Can I start a casting call for that? Maybe I’d get some writing done if that happened.

Really? No? I’m actually surprised. I make my wife blow me while I write sometimes just for fun. Not to cum, just to be able to say I did it, you know what I mean? Sometimes you have to do things just for the story of it.

Have you ever had an orgy? with who? why?
By orgy do you mean more than one? A party of three can be very nice. A girl and a boy. More would be heavenly. I need to wish hard for that.

What’s your favorite book ever?
My own, duh!

If you went to a shrink, what would she diagnose you with?
A case of Skittlespox, Crazytwistedosis and dreameravitis.

No acute kareoakitis (or noraebangitis if you prefer the Korean word)? What about pervisteria?
what’s the biggest dick you’ve ever had the pain/pleasure of taking?
Well, they all ended up being the biggest dick. Oh, you meant size. 10-inch, but who’s measuring? Honestly, it’s not the size, it’s how you use it.

He was a virgin and didn’t know what to do with it. Took me months of personal lessons to get him to a six. He thought he was ready to move on and try it out on others. Sadly, if he hadn’t quit his training, he could’ve been a ten with a ten.

He did come back years later for another few lessons, it was like he’d converted to a born-again virgin. The Anal was great though!

They always want that old thing back, huh?

Bending Over for Jeff and over 30 other books
are all Free for April 2018

Excerpt from July

1 | 2 | 3