Moctezuma Repents for his Porn Peddling Ways, but seriously can’t a Husband Suck His Wife’s Cock Anymore?

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Steak & Blowjob Short Story

Jane’s Steak and Blowjob Night Surprise

If you didn't already know that 3/14 was Steak & Blowjob Day that drop what you're doing and start fingering your pussy because, well, shame on you!

If you didn’t already know that 3/14 was Steak & Blowjob Day that drop what you’re doing and start fingering your pussy because, well, shame on you!

futanari-sluts-free_1I probably have overdone it here and there with all these dildos in deserts and women with massive, animated cocks but the truth is the world is too censored. Maybe I’m all jacked up. I mean I did run a bar for the last 5 years. I’ve been basically the bailiff of a medieval dungeon. My brain cannot be normal, can it?

That said, I’m a good citizen. Very. I hold doors for women, compliment people when they’re polite, and porn peddle blowjob porn and steak and BJ gunge. Also, I’ve broken up fights repeatedly, stopped guys from murdering other guys, and I’m on the shy side, ultimately. Anyways.

This is the last piece to cause the ruckus:

Husband goes down on wife
Can’t a husband even suck his wife’s cock anymore?

If you think the answer should be, “Yes, he can” then, please, have a quick read of [amazon text=Jane’s Steak and BJ Night Surprise&asin=B00UP38NVU] and let me know what you think with a short review. Thank you so much!

Jane’s Steak & Blowjob Night Surprise

Steak & Blowjob Short Story

A Steak & Blowjob Tale by Moctezuma Johnson

I wanted to get this ready for Steak & Blowjob 2015 but like usual I am way too late. Better to be late as a writer than as a jazz musician, so I’ll take it. At least this short story about a married couple having some strap-on and gunge fun is ready. Does gunge and strap-on play match? I really don’t know. But that’s how it’s written.

Jane and David have been married for a while and have a yearly ritual in which Jane cooks the steak and gives the blowjob. This year, a role reversal is about to occur.


The onions smelled delicious. She had one hand on the bulb and one on the big dildo, she aimed it at the frying pan and thought about shooting a vanilla cum load onto their steaks. Should she? It could taste good. Vanilla. She heard keys at the door. She shoved the big dildo into her jeans, just like she was a guy who was caught masturbating. The debate whether shooting cum on their steaks was a good idea would have to be postponed until later. David came in and walked right to her. He was a robot. A titty-stalking robot. When tits were out he went right to them like the Frankenstein’s monster and reached for them. He felt the hard nipples while he rubbed her big tits like he was trying to polish them with the balls of his hands. She moaned and they kissed each other deeply. He kissed down her neck and then started to kiss her tits until he pulled up and said, “It smells great. Nothing like steaks and blowjobs.”

“Blowjobs?” she questioned, emphasizing the plural.

“Who knows? Maybe you’ll be up for multiples.”

She went back to the frying pan and flipped the steaks onto dishes. She had also made custard which was simmering in a pot behind the steaks. Maybe that’s why it smelled so good: grease, onions, and custard. Or maybe it was the vanilla jizz she was wearing in a dildo hidden in her jeans. She wondered if David could see her bulge. She looked down. She could see it.

David, her loving husband, poured two glasses of wine. Two UFOs could have passed through the kitchen and flown into the bedroom making chromatic whining noises and he wouldn’t have noticed. That was David. So focused that it was scary. Fixated now on wine and her tits. Fixated on the day and its imminent oral pleasure.

She put the steaks on the table. She was nervous. Her hands were sweaty. How was she going to break the ice that she was wearing a big cock? This was a mistake. She wanted to take it off.

He stood there unbuckling his belt, lowering his slacks, and pulling out his big cock. It was big. It was beautiful. David was still a young man. Technically he was middle aged, but as she looked at his strong abs like the underside of a crab, his sculpted hips, his barrel chest she felt like he was still a gorgeous young man. He kept himself fit. He wore his black hair neat and parted down the side. He had a strong chin. His cock was out and he was expecting that Jane get right to it.

The nerves melted away as she realized the audacity he had to not worry about how to break the ice. She suddenly found herself very cocky. She picked up a slab of the meat she’d just cooked with her bare hands and ripped it apart. She was surprised at her strength. She crammed a massive piece, more than five neatly cut mouthfuls, into her mouth.

David watched her with wide eyes. He was smiling. He saw this enthusiasm as transferrable to his meat. But he was wrong.

Jane swallowed the entire piece and then reached down and…


…now now, we interrupt these proceedings for a little finances. Please click on over to Amazon and put your quarters in the slot to find out what Jane’s really up to in her naughty little world. Thanks^^


[amazon template=add to cart&asin=B00UP38NVU]

Steak & Blowjob Short Story

Jane’s Steak and Blowjob Night Surprise

Cook, Kneel, Eat, Suck, it’s Steak & BJ Day!


Is it Steak & Blowjob Day Again Already?

Jane gets ready for her annual Steak & Blowjob Day by cooking her husband a steak per their ritual. Normally she’d then be on her knees sucking her good man off showing her total wifey appreciation. But this year she’s got something up her, well, wet, well-lubed, sleeve. Okay, that’s not a sleeve.

If you didn't already know that 3/14 was Steak & Blowjob Day that drop what you're doing and start fingering your pussy because, well, shame on you!

If you didn’t already know that 3/14 was Steak & Blowjob Day that drop what you’re doing and start fingering your pussy because, well, shame on you!

Check out some hot futanari, pegging, strap on, role reversal fun. Who’s getting the steak and who is getting the blowjob. Oh, and why is there custard on the stove? Isn’t it Pi Day too? Can there be gunge too in this awesome, very adult-themed short short?


Who is sucking cock and who has a cock and who is getting her cock sucked?

Jane waits for David to get home just like every other Steak & Blowjob Day but this one will either be a total disaster or more fun than ever. See what happens!

Visit Jane’s Steak & Blowjob Surprise Night on Amazon 

It’s live on Smashwords Now for $.99









Ways to Be Slutty for your Man | The Slut List |


Ways to Be Slutty For Your Man

The Best Thing in the World is a Slutty Girlfriend or Wife. It is just so sexy!

“How can I be more slutty?” is the most common question/comment that I hear


I was struck by one of the running themes readers have said about the Chronicles of a Humiliation Backfired Series. They’ve pointed out that in some way it’s about how much a woman (or man) will take in order to be with the person s/he loves. This is an interesting theme and I realized I’ve really not made any effort to help women out with this. I have written How-To articles aimed at men (my version of Maxim, so on steroids and cialis) but nothing of the sort for women. Allow me to attempt to catch up. Here are some things you regular women can do to totally slut yourself up and makes your man weak in the knees for you. These ways to be slutty aren’t meant to be demeaning to you or your relationship. They are meant to be fun and done with trust and love (or at least deep like).

A lot of women need to be sluttier for their men. When the do that, they keep him forever. George Carlin had “the Shit List”. I present to you “the Slut List”.



  • Wait on for him in the house with fake cum poured on you and tell him you were just used by a horny guy who fucked your ass and raped your throat
  • Lay on your back with your ass up in the air and proudly show off your cunt and ass
    • Corollary, call your vagina your cunt & Call his penis a cock
      TheSlutList No 5 -- Wait For Your Man Wearing Fake Cum And Rubbing Your Cunt

      The Slut List No. 5 — Wait For Your Man Wearing Fake Cum And Rubbing Your Cunt

  • fill a water gun or enema bulb with fake cum and then give it to him to shoot all over you
    • he’ll love admiring your hot body covered, I mean doused, in jizz.
  • Set up the tripod and video him having his way with you, be sure to include a blowjob in your private porn opus. You will surely find him watching it and jerking himself off later and you will be proud.
  • Walk around the house topless
  • Don’t wear any underwear all day. Yes, even if you have to work
  • Shave your cunt
  • Wear lingerie
  • Put a pillow over your own head, wear a mask (especially an animal mask, like a pig mask (try this one), or wear a brown paper bag over your head. Letting him enjoy nothing but your body will drive him wild. Sometimes he needs to objectify you to get a raging hard on and fuck you so good you can’t walk tomorrow.
  • do your hair in pig tails and wear a catholic school girl skirt
  • wear really cheap, plastic earrings
  • wear “club” outfits while eating take out at home
  • do your eye make-up really heavy and let him face fuck you until your mascara runs all over your face
  • let him fuck you in the ass while he watches internet porn from a laptop placed on your back
  • Get on your hands and knees and be his footrest
  • Kneel before him and ask permission to leave the house before you go
  • Give him a sponge bath with your soapy tits as the sponge
  • Have him close his eyes and surprise him by putting different parts of you in his mouth: nipples, fatty part of tit, tongue, clit, ass, etc.
    Write "whore" on yourself or let him write it

    Write “whore” on yourself or let him write it

  • Suck a huge dildo off in front of him
  • Kiss one of your girlfriends in front of him
  • Suck off one of his friends in front of him
  • Fuck a dildo suctioned onto a glass surface so he can see from behind
  • Put in a butt plug before a date with him, tell him it’s in over dinner, and show him later.
  • Suck his dick while he’s titty fucking one of your friends (if you don’t get jealous)
  • Stick your tongue up his ass while you jerk him off
  • Wear a plastic pig nose and a plastic tiara while he fucks you


I think you’ve got the hand of this slut business now. Develop your own, and feel free to share awesome ideas!



Since publication of this “Ways to Be Slutty “article I have received overwhelming response and have compiled my advice into an eBook called The Sex Manual.



Movie Trailer of Chronicles of a Humiliation Backfired

Movie TrailerChronicles of a Humiliation Backfired by Moctezuma Johnson

This is the book trailer from the four part Season One featuring Jynx, Jenny, and MJ. The book features a laundry list of taboos (in order of importance): cum fetish, lesbians, tentacles, billionaires, sex slaves, submission, humiliation, cum crazed Asians with Big Tits, hot Asians, Supermodels, voyeurism, and more. Check out the trailer and then read about these bat shit crazy characters and the steady diet of shit they must endure. You’ll never be the same after!

Headphones suggested