The Romance on Roller-Skates Series by Emme Hor @horbooks #MrBrtg #LPRTG

Love Office Chicks in Compromising Positions? Of course you do! Try more with Emme Hor’s Romance on Rollerskates Series

47_vibrator_orgasm

 

ROMANCE with SKULL CANDY and BRAND NEW SKATES

ROMANCE on ROLLER-SKATES

SMUTPUNK on SKATES

THROWING ROLLER-SKATES IN THE TRASH CHUTE 

 

SMUTPUNK Kimchi Squat

Malaysian Big Tit Sexy Roller Skate Erotica by Emme Hor, the Asian SMUTPUNKist

KUALA LUMPUR, MALAYSIA — 19 MAY 2016 — Insiders are calling this series the Butt Plug Blues (title totally leaked by Moctezuma Johnson, retired smutpunk author) and singing it’s silly, sexy, smutpunkie praises. In each episode an Alpha Male leads Heather to end up with a butt plug up her ass. Somehow she’s always in micro-mini skirts or tight yoga pants and roller-skates. Can this Asian chick be any sexier? Well, the Alpha Male known as ‘That Fucker’ seems to think she can because he’s got a bevy of other girls’ anus’ butt plugs on display in his office on THE BUTT PLUG MANTLE. This cruel alpha, Heather’s boyfriend when the story starts, is out of control. HE’s so bad that Heather’s MILF mother Lana has to step in and help.

It all leads to a massive CLIMAX featuring BUTT PLUGS, ROLLER-SKATES, SKULL CANDY and much much much much smutpunkedly much MORE.

Thursday in the Land of Literary Pulp Smutpunk

I love when “Amazon Customer” drops a surprise 5-star review on me. I’m glad somebody caught the humor and the sex appeal of this weird political satire smutpunk, Dump the Futa President.

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In other news about myself, Triangulum Stain 2 – The Battle for Alien Relish came out of the gate with a bang and then settled back down to Earth (a long fall from the Triangulum Galaxy). I just wanted to pop back in with my fans with this sudden spike to 22nd in LGBT Science Fiction. Thank you whoever is suddenly buying it! Perhaps it’s in part due to the inquisitive and well-written Smutpunk Article by fantasy writer Jamie McLachlan.

No22-in-ScienceFictionBestsellers

Dump the Futa President

Literary Porn Smutpunk

Been messing around with Instagram and with xvideos and pornhub. Have a look at this vid about a Gay Mexican Alien who falls in love with presidential hopeful T. Ronald Dump.

Keep in mind Dump is the Futa President and they will Dump the Futa president. Both meanings are cool in this smutpunk romp.

Give it a read here and Latino Futa Presidential Smutpunk!

Poem with Strong Verb || #poems #psychedlicporn #smutpunk @MJKingOfErotica

A Literary Porn Poem

Softball

sexy red lips

blue baseball cap turned to the side

baseball jersey open

round meaty tits out

flat little nose with two dark nostrils

a Chinese painted vase on the windowsill

a black leather couch

is

just the right vibe

to get her to ride on top of me

with her high pitched breathy moans

grind her hips in that athletic, dancer’s way

until she closes her eyes

rubs her own gorgeous tits

bucks a few lasts times

and says, “that’s what I needed.”

 

$.

bigtitssunshine

Sunshine burst out of her as she came, bucking on top of me

 

 

poem with strong verb

Funny video about the fucking yeti | #EARTG #LPRTG #SSRTG

funny-video-milked-yeti

Funny Video: Milked by the YETI

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Visit the Literary Porn Smutpunk Tag to find all the installments of MILKED BY THE YETI by Moctezuma Johnson and Callie Press. It’s just so bad it’s good: wit-laced B-movie schlock dished out by two of smutpunk’s finest.

Milked by the Yeti | Live on LiteraryPorn.net | #LPRTG #EARTG @calliepress lol

yeti rim job to russian

I am writing MILKED BY THE YETI in installments on literaryporn.net (the companion site to #LPRTG and moctezumajohnson.com)

I’ve released the first two installments and the OUTLINE. I think it will be fun to write this in a totally transparent manner. You can see me succeed or you can see me fail, or most likely land somewhere in the middle. I mean, how can a snowed in story with an abominable snowman and a Russian Slut with big tits not be a grand winner?

Go ahead and have a look.

OUTLINE of BOOK ONE:

INSTALLMENT ONE of MJ’s Milked by the Yeti ONE

INSTALLMENT TWO of MJ’s Milked by the Yeti TWO

INSTALLMENT THREE of MJ’s Milked by the Yeti THREE

INSTALLMENT FOUR of MJ’s Milked by the Yeti FOUR

 

 

EXTRA EXTRA READ ALL ABOUT IT:

An awesome writer, a writer of genius and sex appeal, has expressed interest in writing BOOK two of the fucking yeti series I’ve begun here.

 

 

Callie Press does not rest on her laurels. She writes. She said she’d get behind the wheel for a ride on MILKED BY THE YETI and sure ’nuff, here the thing is. Good news, indeed, little newspaper-selling sir!

Also, with Callie’s posts, she has really taken this “be transparent about how you write” stuff far. Her intros and asides are awesome. We are getting tons of positive feedback. Enjoy!

BOOK TWO:

INSTALLMENT ONE of Callie’s Milked by the Yeti ONE

INSTALLMENT TWO of Callie’s Milked by the Yeti TWO

INSTALLMENT THREE of Callie’s Milked by the Yeti THREE

INSTALLMENT FOUR of Callie’s Milked by the Yeti FOUR

yeti

Callie Press and Moctezuma Johnson each milked out a book of yeti

You know what, somebody has to make a trailer of these MILKED BY THE YETI books.

 

BOOK THREE by Moctezuma Johnson

Part One

Part Two

Part Three 

Part Four

 

And Finally, Book Four by Callie Press has begun!

Part One

 

(if any links are bad please let me know in the comments and try searching on literaryporn.net, thanks^^)

NotQuiteMilkedByTheYeti

 

rs_634x1024-151214132753-634.Heidi-Klum-Naked-FB-121415

Why a model modelling in a block of ice is appropriate makes more sense when you read part 1 of Book 4

 

^.*

Saint to Slut – Is your girl a slut? | Tricks to ascertain her status

saint-to-slut-AllWomenAreWhores

There’s nothing like making a girl go saint to slut

Defiling an innocent girl and getting her to impale herself on your dick is one of the great joys of sex. Another moment of bliss is watching the titties pop out. Watching panties come off is also a moment of glory, but I digress.

How to know if the girl you’re dealing with is a slut

A lot of women are sluts, so chances are you’re in the capable, good hands of one. Most women, and all great women, possess and inner slut who is dying to bust out of that conservative facade, grab you by the balls, and cream all over your dick. But before your ram it up her poop-chute, you may want to test the saint to slut waters first. I find this little trick quite helpful. Set a time limit the first time you talk to a girl. Ask her what her name is in the first twenty-five seconds and ask for a kiss twenty seconds later. If she kisses you then, you’ve likely got yourself a winner. I’m not saying that within a minute she will be in the bathroom kneeling and holding cock in her hand, but at this point it’s pretty safe to say she is leaning more towards whore than prude. If she is a whore, you’re ready to thrive in all aspects of my how-to series. The key thing to remember is that the transformation from saint to slut will not only make you happy, but it will fulfill a burning desire deep inside her too. And she will thank you for revealing her inner whore.

The How To Series – Useful Relationship Advice

This stuff works, guys. You can wipe your ass with Cosmo. The new world order has reduced men to whining little bitches. Yes, me too! I’m on a mission to reclaim my balls and stuff in the mouths of the masses. Come join me. Ladies welcome too!

Big Tits Small Waist

Women with big tits tend to be sluttier. Thank you, slutty women. Thank you. We love when you go Saint to Slut. We are grateful.

^.^

Bimbo Honor | a poem of respect for women of all kinds, from prudes to sluts

big-whore-tits

her tits are torpedoes and ETFs:
double F tits
she never pays for a thing,
a triple A credit rating
from Davao to Madagascar
even on the island of Java
they kneel to this Queen bitch
carve statues in her esteemed
breasty bimbo honor

yet the puritan-looking office girl
riding the train with blouse buttoned to neck
she’s the one that will take a bukkake
and kneel for every whim of her boss
while double F girl
hasn’t had cock
since 2009
and is happier that way
 POEM by MOE JOE JOHN$ON
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Guess Her Rack!

A? B? C? D? DD? — Guess Her Rack

Everybody ogles boobs. Can you correctly guess the size of her tits? 

 

 

All Courtesy of Guess Her Boobs (a blog)