InstaFreebie SMUTPUNK Erotica (IFSE) Mass Giveaway Event

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Enjoy this SMUTPUNK Erotica Giveaway Event

And Get Punk’d Spunkyliciously

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1. Zak Hardacre

[[Image Coming Soon]]

2. Joan Barbara Simon

short n naughty edition

3. Kat Crimson

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4. Emme Hor

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5. Bella Shadows

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6. Roxy Katt

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7. Lucian Carter

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8. Moctezuma Johnson

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If you like winning things like tons of free shit, then join this contest.

Authors, want your book listed here? Apply Within. 

Street Team – The Get S.Punk Crew

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Street Team – The Get S.Punk Crew (aka the SMUTPUNK Media Whores)

Help me and the S. Punk Crew get it on by sharing some promos. Below you can find links, URLs, and images to share on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, and the lot. Thank you in advance for making the S. Punk come to a depraved degenerate near you. 

Rimmies,

MJ

 

BOOK: Choose Your Own SEXcapade by Moctezuma Johnson (aka King SMUTPUNK)

What's with the feet?

What’s with the feet?

LINK: http://geni.us/ChooseYourOwnKink

BLURB: It’s so wrong it’s right. See what the full power of erotica can be in this Choose Your Own Kink Smutpunk. You will feel so alive that you’ll nearly die!

IMAGE  URL: http://i0.wp.com/www.moctezumajohnson.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/06/ChooseYourOwnSEXcapadeWhichPussyWTF2.jpg

Press here to TWEET ON TWITTER

Press here to SHARE ON FACEBOOK

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THANK YOU

Of course I appreciate the help sharing these individual posts. Thank you. However, the real thing is to be part of the crew. In a way to say thanks, I will offer you freebies and other exclusive smutpunk. Use the form below to join.

Join the SMUTPUNK Crew Review Team

 

Which MJ Book Do You Like The Best – A Poll

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Which MJ Book Do You Like The Best – A Poll

What's MJ's best book?

View Results

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Bullshit Bulletin for SMUTPUNKs #10 – Return of the Callie

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Bullshit Bulletin for SMUTPUNKs – Bulletin No. 10

Callie Press is back with a vengeance!  She’s written like 45 books in the last hour and started blogging and making movies and doing all kinds of awesome stuff. Awesome. She’s on youtube (links and embedded video below) doing incredible work when not writing amazing stuff at her Queen of Smutpunk blog. She’s been writing these very useful posts for self-published authors covering grammatical points, how to use editors and beta readers correctly, and more.

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I’m also back but with less vengeance than Callie. My day job takes over my life every November and December, and now I’m kind of returning to normal. I have a few books in the pipeline, including Chronicles of a Humiliation Season Two (yippee ki yay ki yo), Dino-sore, and something about the Deji’i Order tentatively titled STAR WHORES (say that in your head in the voice of James Earl Jones, of course).

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I need your help

I need you to press this link (while signed in to your twitter) and invite your people to join the LPRTG mailing list

Press this link to invite your followers to join the LPRTG fun! There are Freebies from SMUTPUNKs and shit, there are sex tips, there are poems, there are photos, and there may be some finance and hairstyling tips. So give us your email in exchange for Literary PULP Raw Talented Groupie fun! In case you didn’t catch it the LPRTG abbreviation is staying but the Literary Porn tag has been updated. Maybe it will mutate again one day. SMUTPUNK doesn’t rest on its laurels [[tkttkt fact check]]. It rather suck a futa dick.erotic-smutpunk

 

MJ’s next book should be a good one

Chronicles 5! It’s being written right now, finally. I know. I rested on my laurels because I’m a dumb shit. I would apologize but it’s like telling you to be taller or something. Dumb shit is just my way. Resting is another thing I like to do, especially after head.

 

Smutpunk on Skates

Emme’s series has gotten a makeover and a bundle. The bundle is called SMUTPUNK on SKATES (you can see the cover in the header up top). Check out all the NEW PULPY COVERS right fucking here.

Also check out the NEW SMUTPUNK ON SKATES VIDEO PROMO. This is must-see BoobTube.Cum TV.

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Quick-Fire Interviews with HL37 (a recent smutpunk addition) and Patrick Khayler.

Click their names with the superheroes to see what they said.

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You need a Callie Press Joint, they knock the SMUTPUNK loose from your eyelashes.

Join her by subscribing and watching her playlist or watch one here:

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A Moctezuma Johnson Movie:

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Follow MJ’s movies by following Miss Punk E. Schmooster (as he was banned from youtube and uploading movies years ago). If you want to find his channels you’re going to have get him on xvideos. However, for now follow Punk E. instead. She’s the head PA (right, a PA who gives head to all of us — male and female and everything in between) promoting the S.PUNK.

Have you gotten your introduction letter from MJ?

Get your introduction letter from MJ?

 

erotic-smutpunk

What’s your SMUTPUNK name?

If you don’t know GET ONE ASAP.

 

What is SMUTPUNK?

Answer: This is smutpunk.

 

Link to Callie’s Essential Publishing Tips

If you’re an indie writer these are posts that you NEED to read. Callie’s releasing a new one every Sunday and the indie-writer community is incredibly grateful. She makes us all better.

Final thoughts and mailing list info

What you’re not on the most exciting mailing list of 2017! It’s got sex tips, games, freebies, giveaways, contests, and one-on-one banter with the King of SMUTPUNK. What more could you ask for from a mailing list? No really? You have more? Then let me know, but by all means, get your ass stuffed by my throbbing and vibrant outbox.

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Got something important to add?

Let me know.

I’m always around. Email, comment, tweet, or stop me on the street (grabbing me by the balls is the best way to get my wandering attention).

‘Nuff said, said San Esperma di Desgracia

Excelsior!

 

 

Erotic Science Fiction Smutpunk – Triagulum Stain Sci-Fi Series

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Erotic Science Fiction Smutpunk – Triagulum Stain Sci-Fi Series

SMUTPUNK – Yep, smut + punk = awesome sauce

Moctezuma Johnson, Ruler of Literary Porn and Weird Shit that Makes him Laugh

SMUTPUNK

Do we really need another literary category subcategory? Why not, smutpunkists?

by Moctezuma Johnson


There are so many literary ‘punks’ these days that it just seems like a buzzword to use in the new age of selling books via keywords. In today’s marketplace it sure seems like it’s better to dominate some esoteric category like LGBT >> Short reads (29-31 Minutes) >> Shifter >> Sci-Fi >> Medieval History than actually write an amazing book. That means that today’s titles are often clogged up with keywords. Imagine the Classics: Lolita (Old Man Young Vixen Daddy Age Play Series) or Hamlet (DubCon Paranormal 15th Century Murder/Suicide Crime Thriller Mystery Royalty & Aristocrats), or even Star Wars (Metaphysical and Visionary Galactic Empire Space Marine Clones Incenstuous Paranormal Space Soap Opera Dystopian Sci-Fi Series). So everybody is trying to get on the algorithms’s good sides with creative keyword use, and you now have categories upon categories with subcategories inside categories. Frankly, it has become a mess. If you like muck, then you’re in heaven searching for a book on amazon. If you don’t, you type in your favorite keywords and you’re on with it. So now you have steampunk, cyberpunk, splatterpunk, and a bunch of punks to help you sort through the mess and find something cool and unique that you like. Well, add smutpunk to the list. Smutpunk, really? That’s right SMUT + PUNK = AWESOME SAUCE. Although you may think that the term sounds awful, the new(ish) term strangely applies to work that isn’t bad at all. It’s erotica with plot that mixes forms from such varied sources such as magic realism, science fiction, and Asian kung fu movies. In the same way most other punks use some common thing to glue them together, smutpunk uses the most basic protein of all, sperm, to create its own panspermia universe, mixing pop-culture, erotica, the Cthulhu mythos, Far East legends, and Non-Western spirituality with Science Fiction, Pulp, and Silver-Age-Comic era elements into a head spinning, ball-busting, funny good time.

Did you say funny?

That’s right, I can’t believe how serious people are writing about dick in hole. I mean, seriously, I see books dropping name brands left and right, books whose authors abhor the comma, and books who take seducing a step-sister very seriously. It’s just wank material, folks! It’s all a bit of fun. That’s why throwing in an Asian Superstar Lawyer who is also a FUTA that has corrupted the medical profession into giving patients purple pills that transform them into sexy superbeings is all cool. Everybody wants to get off, get entertained, and have a laugh here and there.

So smutpunk was formulated by Emme Hor, Moctezuma Johnson, and Callie Press. They make erotica stand up on its own even if you remove the sex (which these writers admit they sometimes forget to provide) because the plots have other equally important elements. In Halloween 2015 Callie Press’s Butterface was highly-lauded, and Moctezuma Johnson’s Battle for Alien Relish has recently been featured as a kind of B-movie classic on WTF Friday. Smutpunk is just beginning and has only scratched the surface of the its full potential like a Sith lord using the dark side of teh force for tripping her a bully in the cafeteria and then giggling. Get on the slippery smutpunk soaked bandwagon and have a taste. Type smutpunk into Amazon or Google and see what new worlds you get. 

The Smutpunk Dictionary – a must for readers of smut in any of its forms

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Get the vocabulary you deserve with the SMUTPUNK Dictionary

Scribes! Where have my scribes gone? Are they having a futa orgy again. A hyperfuta orgy. I need the scribes to organize and alphabetize this, please. Tell him as soon as he finishes eating his “soup,” thanks. 

 

Bagpiping – Using a chick’s armpit as a way to pleasure cock. She has to push down from the elbow in the same manner as pressing the bladder when playing the bagpipes. The more sweaty the sex the better, as the sweat is like lube. This is a great plan D if the a chick’s primary holes are in use. (learn more)

Black Swan – A term used to express an unlikely event that you may want to prepare for just in case it does occur. Example: Before the human race archived the black swan, people thought there was no such thing as a black swan. Most people incorrectly believed black swans were as real as unicorns. Now we know they do, in fact, exist. Stock market crashes, cataclysmic events, and things getting lodged up your ass and needing emergency room assistance may all classify as black swan events.

Bukkake - when a submissive woman is lucky enough to be worshiped by the splooge of many men. In ancient times she often committed suicide after all the men present jizzed on her to save her family shame. Now bukkakes are often accompanied by the transfer of large sums of money. Whether or not our very own Emme Hor has participated in one can be neither confirmed nor denied.

Bullshit Society – A society in which Bullshit is Truth, Truth Bullshit. Bullshit becomes the official language of this society. They will speak Bullshit (much as George Orwell predicted in 1984 with his concept of “doublespeak”). Turn on FOX news (and many other sources) for a taste. (See quote below right)George Orwell-1984-boot-on-face-smutpunk-quote

Dot-Connectors – People able to connect seemingly random, unconnectable ideas. Average Fuckers often mistake this awesome ability as random. Smutpunkists taste the awesome sauce in it.

The Five Hive – Also known as the Fuck Force Five, these ladies are highly trained Women in Black agents tasked with keeping the Earth safe from extraterrestrials. They are trained in advanced fucking, quantum physics, and rappelling down giant dildos.

Match of the Centuries – the epic battle between Butterface and Princess Chuckhole (See flyer)

Miss Lonely Hearts – This is the female straggler found in many bars and clubs who is pretty much good to go. Most guys can sit down with her, probably not even buy her a drink yet take her home and pound her until something gives, like a sink, a penis bone, or a pelvis. Often Miss Lonely Hearts makes a really top notch one night stand. She usually shows good manners, good hygiene, and good skills drinking, taking drugs, and in the sack.

Clear Heels – the required footwear of sluts all over the planet and universe. When men find a girl wearing these heels they can rest assured that they are in for a good time (similar items are hoop earrings, g-strings, and pink scrunchies).

Fictophilia – a condition involving an irrevocable and passionate love for a fictional character. In fact, 60% of singles surveyed said they prefer a fictional book boyfriend to a living breathing male.

Futa – A woman with a large cock. (See Reed James)

Splooge - the magical liquid that spews from cock jerked to satisfaction. The very life force of the universe. The stuff that flows through Planet Alien Relish. The material for which Butterface is in an obsessive and violent search.

Spunk – See splooge

Smutpunk – It’s erotica with plot that mixes forms from such varied sources as magic realism, science fiction, and Asian kung fu movies. In the same way most other punks use some common thing to glue them together, smutpunk uses the most basic protein of all to create its own panspermia universe, mixing pop-culture, erotica, the Cthulhu mythos, Far East legends, and Non-Western spirituality with Science Fiction, Pulp, and Silver-Age-Comic era elements into a head spinning, ball-busting good time.

The Buttplug Mantel – Where Liam, aka That Fucker, keeps his trophy case of used buttplugs with little exhibit label flags like a museum that explain the who, what, where, why, how of the butt plug displayed. Some executives have slayed animals, others have athletic trophies, That Fucker has the butt plug mantel. (Read about it)

The Smutpunk Lexicon – a dictionary of the tasty words peppered on your smutpunk.

Tudung – a headscarf worn by Malay women. (see more)tudung-titties

Average Fuckers – In an effort to keep my wife happy, I’m no longer calling 99% of the world morons and instead trying to be more accurate by calling them average. I say it with tons of hidden malice. Well, the malice ain’t hidden to the dot-connectors, bless their depraved coal-hearts.

Hyperfuta – a futa with a cock the size of a car.

PAAG – Phat Ass Asian Girl. An Asian chick with a big, juicy phat ass. (See PAAG tumblr site)

PAWG – Phat Ass White Girl. A white chick with a big, juicy phat ass! (See PAWG tumblr site)

Phallogyne – waiting for Roxy Katt’s definition. It seems to me to be a broader grouping of Futa, Traps, Transgenders, and other peoples with penises.

SMUTPUNK Freedom Flag – The movement’s flag of freedom to spunk! (See Image)

Trump Butt Plug – Words cannot describe this Commander-in-Cheeks. (See Trump Butt Plug)

Yoga Pants – Really tight pants hot chicks wear to attract alpha males like bees to the honey pot. (see example)

 

 

If you’d like a word added, just leave it in the comments below and I’ll see what I can do. 

Please Share This Post and Educate the World

I don’t like telling you what to do, but you really should add this to the SMUTPUNK WIKI. I’m just saying.