Teaser of Gallery of Various Smutpunk Art (300+ pieces) | #LPRTG #Erotica

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Gallery of Delicous, Uncut Smutpunk Covers (you’ll never find these on major retailers)

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Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like it’s a shame that this kind of talented artwork cannot be shared on the major retailers. Anyway, I can’t always fight the man. However, I can run my own site with autonomy and share this genius with you. Enjoy!

Dear Smutpunk,

Below is TEASER from the Gallery of Various Smutpunk Art from this site from 2015-2017. Browse through it as you wish and click to enlarge smaller images. Some of the covers are really precious but thanks to our conservative society cannot be shared in public places like facebook, amazon, and pinterest. So I ask that you join me in the exclusive VIP Smutpunk club where thankfully this site allows you the freedom and trust to see and read what you want 100% uncut. In the VIP Smutpunk club you can let your dick and/or tits hang out, smoke a joint or rolled unicorn spit for all I care, and touch yourself until you squirt bubbling pink hearts through the ceiling. I hope you feel at home. Enjoy! 

Rimmies,
MJ

Black Comedy by Moctezuma Johnson

miley-cyrus-doggy-style

TriangulumStain-banner-advert-thai-literary-porn-mall2

 

PrettyMoctezumaQuote

Futadelic - The Power of Potion

Attack of the Replicating Dildos

Alien Wrestling Night

Alien Wrestling Night

 

She was tired of hubby’s rice dick. She was ready for something big and full. This cover got the book into the dungeon and I’ve just left it. Fuck it. I am what I am.

 

 

There are hundreds more to browse, from a little erotica to hardcore smutpunk literary porn.

Get your subscription or join the Smutpunk Street Team for access to
the FULL EXXXTENSIVE SMUTPUNK GALLERY.

America doesn’t deserve a Birthday Party this Year…

happy-4th-smutpunk

…but we can still enjoy some sexy photos instead of celebrating a functioning democracy.

 

The red, white, and blue have, instead of democracy, a nasty imperial force that causes proxy wars all over the globe with an umprecedictable nut figurehead at the helm. Yep, no birthday party this year.

Happy ThighHigh Thursday! #ThighHighThursday #LPRTG #smutpunk

ThighHighThursday-Thong

Happy Thong & ThighHigh Thursday!

Step inside the anus for more free thong fun.

^.^

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If you want to full size a certain image that won’t enlarge, let me know in the comments. Thanks.

How to Make an Interactive, Designed Tweet

Learn how to make tweets work for you more!

Okay, Press Me to See what the fuck MJ is talking about, first.

Okay, so this mess (https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?text=Shit%20@MJKingOfErotica%20can%20teach%20you%20an%20incredible%20trick%20http://wp.me/p6B82a-1lb%20%23LPRTG%20%23DesignedTweet%20%23Tips) can become a pretty, neat, pre-written tweet containing twitter handle and hashtags.

How, MJ, How? Well it’s simple if you know a little unicode. Now, I’m not going to explain the whole alphabet to you but you will notice a lot of %20s and %23s. Well, those are the basic pieces you need to code your own interactive designed tweet buttons.

  1. First, you start with this code: https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?text=
  2. Next write your first word of the tweet flush against the “=” sign. (See my test tweet above)
  3. Then use “%20” for a a space.
  4. Now write a word and then %20 until you have the text of your tweet.
  5. Include an @twitter-handle (write your twitter handle here) so that you are notified each time somebody tweets
  6. I suggest you try to sneak this into the main sentence of your tweet, but that’s just so it looks neat
  7. Be sure to add a link to whatever it is that you want people tweeting about
    • book links, websites, moctezumajohnson.com
  8. Add hashtags by inserting the code %23 before the tag you want.
    • Note: still use %20 to make sure you have a space or the hashtag won’t read and will be impotent.
  9. There are more codes but these are the basics to make an interactive tweet.
  10. When you’ve finished your code, insert it as the link url to any link. I usually use “Press This” but you can add it to any text.
    • Tag me in your first designed tweet so I can see my star pupil in action and start retweeting your success.

 

If you enjoyed this little tech tip, please tweet this with the “PRESS ME” button and let others know that MJ is awesome. Only his helpfulness exceeds his awesomeness.

 

 

https://twitter.com/intent/tweet?text=Get%20the%20increible%20Sex%20Manual%20by%20@MJKingOfErotica
%20by%20joining%20the%20smutpunk%20party%20bit.ly/EmailLPRTG%20
%23LPRTG%20%23Freebie%20%23SexTips
 

Sex Manual – Tweet out a Promo

Sex Manual – Tweet out a Promo

Press to Tweet Out a Promo about The Sex Manual. Thank you for helping me out.

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Leave a comment below if you’d like me to teach you how to make this kind of link for your blog? Cheers, MJ

National Pancake Day – Pancake Tits

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National Pancake Day Poem – Pancake Tits

poem by Moctezuma Johnson

I pick her up from the barpuffy_nipples-2146

the bra comes off

she has empty

saggy pancake tits

 

i fry an egg on the stovenyla-thai-pornstar

dump it onto her

saggy little tits

let the yoke run

 

down her cleavagetumblr_modzxsEG0K1som2kro1_1280

to her belly button

then i straddle her

dip my balls in her mouth

 

i turn 180 degreesnational-pancake-day-tits3

so my cock is between her saggy tits

she licks my asshole

i pick up the pancake mix titties

 

and rub them around my cocktumblr_nd9osok45l1s0c71jo1_1280

getting messy with egg yoke

and jizz into the concoction

and say “Happy Pancake Day, Self!”

 

Wedgie Wednesday | #WedgieWednesday #LPRTG

wedgie-wednesday

I like digging up hot photos of funny porn. Sex and humor are a match made in heaven for me. I know a lot of you witty degenerates agree with me. Alas, we have…

Wedgie Wednesday

(applause applause!)

Kick back and enjoy a few of these photos with me.

WedgieWednesday

WedgieWednesday2

WedgieWednesday3

wedgie-wednesday

Asian Big Tits and Slutty Wives in this SMUTPUNK

Two Great Options if you Asian Big Tits

1.

Like wives in compromising situations? Give me slutty wife erotica!

There’s nothing like having an Asian Wife on her knees licking your balls. There’s nothing like getting sex before the dinner date while walking down the stairway before getting to the restaurant. There’s nothing like regular meetings doing the wife with big tits on the hood of the car while the husband watches and jerks off in the driver’s seat. These are some of the situations in the slutty wife erotica of Bored To Tears with My Asian Husband by Moctezuma Johnson.

2.

Give me Asian Wife erotica by Emme

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asian-big-tits

Bullshit Bulletin #7 @MJKingOfErotica #LPRTG #EARTG @horbooks

There has been a significant rise in the number of LPRTG Newsletter followers. Thank you to all the new recruits.

For those of you considering joining, consider this:

WE WANT YOU! WE WANT YOU! WE WANT YOU AS A NEW RECRUIT

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This Site

The other awesome success has been the rise in people buying directly from this site via paypal. It’s a great way for the reader to pay less for our books while the author gets the entire profit. It’s win win for both author and reader. Do take advantage. Visit the Book Shop and find titles that interest you.

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Choose Your Own Kink SEXcapade

What's with the feet?

What’s with the feet? Click the heels to buy the book!

Of course, the nude new news for MJ fans is that he’s crawled out from under a rock to pen the Choose Your Own Kink SEXcapade and is about to drop a How To book that will blow your fucking minds. It’s kind of my version of Callie Press’s How To Give Good Head. As you know, women kind of suck at giving head except for a few blesséd souls.

This one is about you. And, hot damn, are you sexy and up to your ears in pussy and problems. There’s chocolate sauce, there’s custard, there are bicycles handles in assholes, there are synapses soaked with dopamine, there is romance, a virgin touched by Allah, a hooker (well, they say she’s a hooker), and a cameraman in a Darth Vader mask telling you the intricacies of Gorilla Glue. What? Yep, there’s a hell of a lot of stuff, but YOU pick which option you want because this is a CHOOSE YOUR OWN KINK. That’s right! See the hot girls in pink over there? Click them to buy this amazing new pulpy erotic smutpunk.

Also, please leave a review. Even if you just write a word or “it was good!” I will be eternally grateful. Reviews rock! Reviewers rock! Rimmies rimmies!

Do you hear that? Right in the peripheral of your brain. Yes that. Like audio ghosts. What the…? What is that? Is that what I think it is, baby? Callie? Emme? Genevieve? Mama? Is that the funk? The Flashlight? the Mothership? How’s your Funk? la da da di da da da da da da da. Shit! Goddamn! Get off your ass and jam! 

How’s your Funk-Entelechy? Me? Well, I’m known as lollipop man, aka the long-haired sucker, so not to0 funkin’ bad. Why are there stars in your eyes? All the better to funk you with.

Bernie Worrell, Dr. Woo, RIP, my funk brotha!

I was lucky enough to see Dr. Woo play over thirty times at various locations from small supper clubs to big concert halls. I was also given the amazing moment of meeting the band and chatting with them for hours, which I’ll obviously never forget. This man truly changed my life. Y’all may not know, some of you do, that I moonlight as a funk brother playing drums, keyboard, guitar, and bass depending on the funk. In fact, I didn’t have eyes on writing at all when I was younger. I was music all the way. If you’d like to know the truth, ask away. Until then, i’ll leave it shrouded in mystery. Listen to one of the greatest keyboard players to ever touch the planet Earth.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tL8shj6yx0 – Very cool jam with even the audience involved

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Anything else to report these days? If so, let me know.

Ooh Ooh, nerdy girl editing by Jenn, the ex-Disney star. Try her out. She did the Choose Your Own Kink SEXcapades. She’s a genius. Any mistakes are mine, not hers. I’m the one who can’t edit worth shit. Click the link and see what she offers. Mention my name when you do.

And the last thing is there are a lot of new poems on this site by both me and my new super-crush Genevieve Greene.

 

A parting tweet to enjoy:

#PancakeTitties for Mexican National Pancake Day | #PancakeTits #LPRTG

 

do1

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breakfast-in-bed

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pancakes

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Pancake Titties

How can you not want to eat up delicious Pancake Titties?

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