Smutpunk Erotica Giveaway | #LPRTG #SmutpunkGiveaway #Erotica

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Messing around with a Smutpunk Erotica Giveaway

I wanted to make one contest like this where you have to jack or jill off to enter. Now how can I make sure that you do so? How do I verify? Well, there’s no way to be absolutely sure and we are all adults here so I think we can go with the honor system. However, I would like to feel like you’re not cheating in this contest, so I think you should join the mailing list (a contest requirement) and read some hot smutpunk spunklit and that will surely lead you to jack/jill off and everyone wins.

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You can win a Kindle Fire Tablet with Alexa, $50 in the form of a Gift Card, an incredible SMUTPUNK Mug, a $35 SMUTPUNK BOOK SHOP Shopping Spree, and, of course, the Kindle Fire comes stuffed with books from participating authors!
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Contest Rules & Disclaimer

You need to register for the LPRTG Mailing List to join. (bit.ly/EmailLPRTG)

The Kindle Fire can only be won by residents of the continental USA, sorry. All other prizes are available to all.

InstaFreebie SMUTPUNK Erotica (IFSE) Mass Giveaway Event

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Enjoy this SMUTPUNK Erotica Giveaway Event

And Get Punk’d Spunkyliciously

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1. Zak Hardacre

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2. Joan Barbara Simon

short n naughty edition

3. Kat Crimson

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4. Emme Hor

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5. Bella Shadows

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[[Link Coming Soon]]

6. Roxy Katt

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7. Lucian Carter

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8. Moctezuma Johnson

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9. SURPRISE ENTRY

[[tune in soon to find out what the surprise is!]]

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If you like winning things like tons of free shit, then join this contest:

Join the Contest and Win!

Authors, want your book listed here?

Apply Within

Some Stats about Reading Erotica | Erotic SMUTPUNK makes you more desirable

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Some Stats about Reading Erotica

Erotic Smutpunk Will Make you MORE DESIRABLE

This is very interesting information that I got from reading some forums today. 

Did you know men are most attracted to women who read erotica?

Get this! Sixty Percent of singles would rather date a book lover. That absolutely cracks me up. That’s our nature, isn’t it? We always want the impossible. So all those women out there reading suit smut on the subway would rather date a figment of their imagination than an actual flesh and blood man. However, don’t worry, dudes, forty percent would prefer a real dick to a wand and the mental image of a man from a book.

According to polls, men preferred women who read hardcore erotica. It seems men want their women to be well versed it what to do in the bedroom. So, ladies, get reading your smutpunk.

The other things to keep in mind, women, is that one in five men find the woman erotica reader to be the perfect type. I guess they think that women who read erotica will be open-minded sexually. That’s a big plus. The fact that men think about sex every three seconds coincides nicely with women projecting sexy. So get reading! And, men, be like the man in women’s minds.

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*leave a comment if some stats about reading erotica surprised you. Thanks^^

Steak and BJ Day – A short short story

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Steak and BJ Day – A short short Story

B. Manwhore – The Steak was Overcooked but the BJ was Raw

Story by Moctezuma Johnson

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“Honey, what’s this book you have here?”

“What book? I didn’t leave any book.”

“You sure? Black book with red trim? Picture of a buxom bimbo on the front kneeling in front of a man in a suit? It says it’s by B. Manwhore. You know him?”

“Never heard of him.”

Curious as I always was, I flipped open the pages and will never be the same. I guess this is what some feel when they peruse the work of Moctezuma Johnson, like their virginity itself had been raped viciously, and that’s what I felt upon opening the heavy satin pages of this discarded smutpunk. When I opened the pages, I smelled the distinct odor of vanilla as dust puffed out the book.

“Where did it come from?” I called out to my wife.

“If you want to talk, come in here. I’m sick of yelling across the apartment.”

My wife was never any help in my rambling curiosity, but I was sure I had not left any book here on the table beside the couch. I would remember a red and black satin cover like this too. This was new. It was beautiful.

I flipped through the pages and will try to summarize what I saw and read. My mouth hung open as I read. I felt so excited that I could feel the muscles behind my balls aching they were working so hard. It was a bizarre feeling but it was also great. I was sweating at the upper lip, my legs were shaking, and my heart was beating fast.

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In the book was a gorgeous woman with smooth skin, big phat butt cheeks that any renaissance sculptor would be dying to carve in stone, and steely piercing blue eyes. This woman with the cold eyes of a killer was there and my wife, the one who had never seen this book, was hugging her. My wife was a good looking woman, she kept herself yoga fit and this other woman’s caramel hands squeezed by wife’s fine booty and then their tongues came together. The sharp tip of the woman’s tongue met my wife’s tongue and then disappeared in her mouth. They kissed ravenously and then a voice told the caramel hands to take my wife’s top off. If you are wondering how I could be sure it was my wife in this book, rest assured it was easy. They called her by her name, Jisoo, and the book was live. As I looked at it I saw it. It was really happening in my mind, like a memory. It was better than TV or Movie or Netflix or Youtube. It was realer. And Smutpunker. And as Deliza kissed my wife’s big Asian tits I saw her beauty mark right on the side boob. Behind the two women enlaced in foreplay was a man standing in front of a stove. He was B. Manwhore. Nobody knew what the B. stood for. They all called him B. Maybe he had a white-boy name like Brent or Bryan, or maybe it was more exotic like Booker or Belaji. Anyway, B. Manwore was a big man of nondescript background. He may have been white, he may have been Latino, maybe he was from the Middle East. It was hard to tell but he was commanding. He watched the girls get each other hot, kissing, necking, sucking on each others tits. Deliza’s breasts were magnificent. They were big and squishy yet still firm even though they were much bigger than my wife’s pair. Deliza held them around Jissoo’s face and kissed her cleavage and all the ample side boob that squashed around Jisoo’s eye cavity and nose. Jisoo was drowning in big black boobs and loving it. She was fingering her pussy and B. Manwhore was grinning from ear to ear. He lowered his pants and a massive cock popped out. It was like a bean stalk. It was so big it must have had different area codes. He winked at me, I guess he knew I was watching through the book. He snapped his fingers and the girls stopped sucking on each other and obediently kneeled in front of Manwhore. The more he controlled by wife and this other delicious woman the more aroused I became. I liked seeing Jisoo under the sexual hypnosis of another man. I was at once jealous and excited. My stomach was racing with emotions.

My wife watched as Deliza struggled to get half his massive dick into her throat. Manwhore handed my wife two steaks off the frying pan. As Deliza tried to suck his massive dick my wife obediently fed Manwhore steak, animalistically. He ate the whole slap by ripping piece by piece out of my wife’s delicate hands. The Manwhore was a beast.

Finally, after he had jizzed on Deliza’s shaved slit. Deliza sat on the kitchen table while my wife licked his cum off of her. Meanwhile she was on her hands and knees, offering herself to him. He took her from behind and made her scream. My wife throws her head back when she cums. Her breasts were shaking, her ass was spread, and Manwhore pounded her pussy hard and deep from behind. Jisoo had licked up all the cum from Deliza’s shaved snatch and that’s when Manwhore pushed all the way inside of her hard and held his dick up there. Jisoo threw her head back and moaned.

I closed the book. I was sweating profusely. I stood up and looked at the stove. There were two pans with the fatty remnants of a steak being cooked.

“Honey? Did you cook a couple of steaks today?”

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THE END

$. Steak and BJ Day Proceeds got the Breast Cancer Research Foundation $.

Like Silly Little Steak and BJ Day Tales?

Try Jane’s Steak and BJ Night Surprise or The Steak and BJ Bundle

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Hot Women – SMUTPUNK Erotica Images

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Hot Women – Smutpunk Erotica Images

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Look at those Big Tits (big Asian tits) dipping in the water!

#NSFW Fotos eroticas del escritor Moctezuma Johnosn @MJKingOfErotica

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Natasha from MILKED BY THE YETI

Natasha from MILKED BY THE YETI

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I'm not sure where the line between classy and nasty is all the time.

I’m not sure where the line between classy and nasty is all the time.

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At the back of Bored to Tears by My Asian Husband is a very fucked up story of a young wife and an alleyway. It’s a little smutpunk gem in an otherwise pretty straightforward little book.

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Sex Tip #11 – The Proper Way for Ladies to Arch their backs during doggy style

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These are Moctezuma Johnson’s Weekly Sex Tips Cosmo Just Doesn’t Have the Balls to Give You

The Proper Way to Arch Your Back during Doggy Style Sex

Yep that’s the right way to do it (see photo to the right — or above or wherever it lands on your device). Of courseideally her head should be in the carpet with a foot on her head and her lips wrapped around a toe, unless there’s a second cock, in which case her lips should be tightly gripping the base of said second cock. She should have her ass high up in the air and her lower back in a concave shape. She should NOT have her lower back in a convex shape. Bad. In other words, if the man fucking her from behind were to drop a toy car down her ass crack it would ramp down her spinal canal to her lower back and then shoot up her shoulder blades and jump in the air. If she’s in the correct position when he pulls out and jizzes on her back, the cum will form a pool on her lower back. It will not drip off like vanilla sauce on a chocolate scoop sitting atop a cone.

That’s the correct position for doggy style sex, not this lame trembling cat stretching pose. It’s amazing how unsexy a little convex lift of the lower back is. An arched back is pure sex appeal. So, ladies, men, transgenders, get in the right position when taking a good fucking from behind.

This position is also the correct position to be in when sucking cock of someone seated on the couch. This position gives him a gorgeous view of your ass. Remember, the visual is half the fun of a good blowjob.

This position is also the correct position for looking for loose change under the couch when scrounging money for cigarettes.

Note: Any photos emailed to me of the correct position will receive a complimentary prize. If you don’t have my email address, please get it at my mailing list.

More Sex Tips

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