The FUTA Dicksicle Stand on Amazon #LPRTG #BookBoost

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The Futa Dicksicle Stand by Moctezuma Johnson

It’s out! Live! New Release! Compra compra compra! Damas y Caballeros…Ladies and Gentleman…여러분…download the sticky, creamy dicksicle sisterhood fun now. 

Basic Plot:

A sexually repressed pregnant woman tries to solve hot flashes by a drive to get ice cream. Instead her friendship with her bestie gets tested when a FUTA-on-FEMALE ménage-e-trois is suggested by a sexy, sassy dicksicle cashier. Find out how far our heroine is willing to go to please her bestie and keep the creamsicles milkie.

Smutpunk is its own language | #SMUTPUNK #LPRTG #EROTICA

smutpunk-is-its-own-language

Smutpunk is its own language

smutpunk is its own language

Cafe con leche — porque gatos…

You may have seen that I’m publishing more books and sex tips in Spanish. I speak Spanish poorly, but I do speak, so that’s been an advantage as I can work with my translators to find phrasings and styles that I like. What other languages would you like to see smuptunk translated into?

Into which languages would you like to see smutpunk books translated? (Choose up to three)

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New Tabbed Smutpunk Bookshelf

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New Tabbed Smutpunk Bookshelf

All the madcap cyberpunk, splatterpunk, genre-blending, gender-bending S. Punk you’ve come to expect from MJ, aka King SMUTPUNK

Click the tabs to see what books lie in that category. Start with Futanari and work your way all the way to Sci-Fi. 

Futadelic (see review

Romancing the Hot Stone (see review

Futa Dicksickle Stand (Cumming May 29th) — Join the Mailing List to Get Notifications of Release Dates and Sales/Freebies!

Chronicles of a Humiliation Backfired (Season One)

Chronicles of a Humiliation Backfired (Season Two) — Cumming Soon — Join the Mailing List to Get Notifications of Release Dates and Sales/Freebies!

Messy Blowjob Gunge Pie Steak Pi Day

Promotional Poster for the Steak and BJ Bundle

Jane’s Steak and BJ Night Surprise (see review

The Nose (see review

The Steak and BJ Bundle (see review

Real and Imaginary

Poisonous Apples

Smutpunk Poetry (coming soon) Join the Mailing List to Get Notifications of Release Dates and Sales/Freebies!

The Black Book (coming soon) Join the Mailing List to Get Notifications of Release Dates and Sales/Freebies!

Click the Tongue for Fun

Choose Your Own Kink SEXcapade

A story all about YOU in which YOU make all the decisions!

Pop-n-Lollie--Pulp

Triangulum Stain – Attack of the Replicating Alien Dildos

Triangulum Stain 2 – Battle for Alien Relish

The TriStain Universe Episodes:

Pop & Lollie (Teabagged by the Sentient Lollipop aka the Candy Cunt Saga)

 

 

 

Am I missing something? Let me know. Please share this ever-updating bookshelf with your followers, too. Thank you.

Find Your SMUTPUNK Name: From G-strung to the Kitchen Cowgirl, names rock!

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Click the image to enlarge and find your SMUTPUNK name

One of the fun parts of writing SMUTPUNK is the names. Check out the smutpunk wiki for some of the great names that have already come out over the years. You’ve met Princess Chuckhole, Bob Von Bulge, and the rulers of Alien Relish called SLUTS of the OBLONG table. Now any self-respecting fan of depraved protein painting will have dreamed of having such a moniker herself. Well, here at SMUTPUNK unincorporated, dreams do come true one aka at a time.

By the way, according to this, I’m Motley Van Verga. Verga means dick in Spanish. What’s yours? Please leave yours in the comments section. Enjoy!

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Pulp Covers: SMUTPUNK on Skates (aka The Butt Plug Blues)

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Pulp Covers: SMUTPUNK on Skates (aka The Butt Plug Blues, Romance on Roller-Skates) by Emme Hor

skull-candy-roller-skates-smutpunk1. Asian SMUTPUNK Book One: Romance with Skull Candy & Roller-Skates

RomanceAlphaBillionaire20012. Romance with the Alpha Billionaire

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3. Smutpunk On Skates Romance

 

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4. Throwing Roller-Skates in the Trash Chute

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5. The Bundle of Books 1-4

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These four books take readers to Malaysia and give you an exotic, sexy taste of Asian Smutpunk. Click to get all four of these books or one inexpensive bundle. Emme is known as the First Lady of Smutpunk, the Asian Smutpunk, and wife of Moctezuma Johnson. She spends her time mixing perfumes for a well-known designer and enjoys writing as her downtime. Whether or not she took a bukkake when younger can be neither confirmed nor denied.

Video Promo: Romance with Skull Candy and Roller Skates

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Video Promo: Romance with Skull Candy and Roller Skates

Promo by Moctezuma Johnson and Book by Emme Hor

 

Heather is a sweet Asian office worker with an obsession brewing. She’s trying hard to please him and going further and further. He invites her into an abandoned movie theater and things quickly escalate until she gets a way more sensory filled experience than she could handle. Read this Asian SMUTPUNK from the First Lady of SMUTPUNK Emme Hor.

 

https://erotic-smutpunk.tumblr.com/post/155744185458/get-a-freebie-from-emme-hor

The Smutpunk Dictionary – a must for readers of smut in any of its forms

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Get the vocabulary you deserve with the SMUTPUNK Dictionary

Scribes! Where have my scribes gone? Are they having a futa orgy again. A hyperfuta orgy. I need the scribes to organize and alphabetize this, please. Tell him as soon as he finishes eating his “soup,” thanks. 

 

Bagpiping – Using a chick’s armpit as a way to pleasure cock. She has to push down from the elbow in the same manner as pressing the bladder when playing the bagpipes. The more sweaty the sex the better, as the sweat is like lube. This is a great plan D if the a chick’s primary holes are in use. (learn more)

Black Swan – A term used to express an unlikely event that you may want to prepare for just in case it does occur. Example: Before the human race archived the black swan, people thought there was no such thing as a black swan. Most people incorrectly believed black swans were as real as unicorns. Now we know they do, in fact, exist. Stock market crashes, cataclysmic events, and things getting lodged up your ass and needing emergency room assistance may all classify as black swan events.

Bukkake – when a submissive woman is lucky enough to be worshiped by the splooge of many men. In ancient times she often committed suicide after all the men present jizzed on her to save her family shame. Now bukkakes are often accompanied by the transfer of large sums of money. Whether or not our very own Emme Hor has participated in one can be neither confirmed nor denied.

Bullshit Society – A society in which Bullshit is Truth, Truth Bullshit. Bullshit becomes the official language of this society. They will speak Bullshit (much as George Orwell predicted in 1984 with his concept of “doublespeak”). Turn on FOX news (and many other sources) for a taste. (See quote below right)George Orwell-1984-boot-on-face-smutpunk-quote

Dot-Connectors – People able to connect seemingly random, unconnectable ideas. Average Fuckers often mistake this awesome ability as random. Smutpunkists taste the awesome sauce in it.

The Five Hive – Also known as the Fuck Force Five, these ladies are highly trained Women in Black agents tasked with keeping the Earth safe from extraterrestrials. They are trained in advanced fucking, quantum physics, and rappelling down giant dildos.

Match of the Centuries – the epic battle between Butterface and Princess Chuckhole (See flyer)

Miss Lonely Hearts – This is the female straggler found in many bars and clubs who is pretty much good to go. Most guys can sit down with her, probably not even buy her a drink yet take her home and pound her until something gives, like a sink, a penis bone, or a pelvis. Often Miss Lonely Hearts makes a really top notch one night stand. She usually shows good manners, good hygiene, and good skills drinking, taking drugs, and in the sack.

Clear Heels – the required footwear of sluts all over the planet and universe. When men find a girl wearing these heels they can rest assured that they are in for a good time (similar items are hoop earrings, g-strings, and pink scrunchies).

Fictophilia – a condition involving an irrevocable and passionate love for a fictional character. In fact, 60% of singles surveyed said they prefer a fictional book boyfriend to a living breathing male.

Futa – A woman with a large cock. (See Reed James)

Splooge the magical liquid that spews from cock jerked to satisfaction. The very life force of the universe. The stuff that flows through Planet Alien Relish. The material for which Butterface is in an obsessive and violent search.

Spunk – See splooge

Smutpunk – It’s erotica with plot that mixes forms from such varied sources as magic realism, science fiction, and Asian kung fu movies. In the same way most other punks use some common thing to glue them together, smutpunk uses the most basic protein of all to create its own panspermia universe, mixing pop-culture, erotica, the Cthulhu mythos, Far East legends, and Non-Western spirituality with Science Fiction, Pulp, and Silver-Age-Comic era elements into a head spinning, ball-busting good time.

The Buttplug Mantel – Where Liam, aka That Fucker, keeps his trophy case of used buttplugs with little exhibit label flags like a museum that explain the who, what, where, why, how of the butt plug displayed. Some executives have slayed animals, others have athletic trophies, That Fucker has the butt plug mantel. (Read about it)

The Smutpunk Lexicon – a dictionary of the tasty words peppered on your smutpunk.

Tudung – a headscarf worn by Malay women. (see more)tudung-titties

Average Fuckers – In an effort to keep my wife happy, I’m no longer calling 99% of the world morons and instead trying to be more accurate by calling them average. I say it with tons of hidden malice. Well, the malice ain’t hidden to the dot-connectors, bless their depraved coal-hearts.

Hyperfuta – a futa with a cock the size of a car.

PAAG – Phat Ass Asian Girl. An Asian chick with a big, juicy phat ass. (See PAAG tumblr site)

PAWG – Phat Ass White Girl. A white chick with a big, juicy phat ass! (See PAWG tumblr site)

Phallogyne – A broader grouping of Futa, Traps, Transgenders, and other peoples with penises. Roxy Katt says, “A phallogyne is basically a woman with a penis.  This is a catch-all category that includes (but is not limited to) futanari, “shemales,” and transwomen who have had genital reassignment surgery.  Phallogyne” can refer to any real or fictional person who just naturally has basically a woman’s body but with a penis.  How she got the penis (naturally, surgically, by magical transformation, etc.) does not affect her status as a phallogyne. Whether there are testicles or not does not change the fact the person is a phallogyne, and whether she has a vagina or not in addition to the penis does not change her status as a phallogyne. Defining the term as widely as possible, “phallogyne” can also include male to female transvestites.”

SMUTPUNK Freedom Flag – The movement’s flag of freedom to spunk! (See Image)

Trump Butt Plug – Words cannot describe this Commander-in-Cheeks. (See Trump Butt Plug)

Yoga Pants – Really tight pants hot chicks wear to attract alpha males like bees to the honey pot. (see example)

 

 

If you’d like a word added, just leave it in the comments below and I’ll see what I can do. 

Please Share This Post and Educate the World

I don’t like telling you what to do, but you really should add this to the SMUTPUNK WIKI. I’m just saying.

Enter the Giveaway: Scandalous Reads featuring Dr. Smutpunk

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Elli Everson, Eva Lefoy, Ines Johnson, Iona Findley, LaVerne Thompson, Lilah E. Noir, Maggie Carpenter,
Marie Tuhart, Melissa Stevens, Miranda Lynn, Moctezuma Johnson, Monica Corwin, Muffy Wilson,
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