Missing Jenny – Psychedelic Smutpunk Poem #smutpunk #LPRTG

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i want to send Jenny
a phat juicy ass
and puckered asshole
a watusi mass
and cupboard bowl
velcro’d to a message:
we could have stayed together
i miss pumping your
six hangers
your either holes
your chopsticks
crucifix
and lemonade mix
no more cliffhangers, baby
just hers
she knows my
secret breathing
get your ugly whore face
over here now
we can swing together
from tit to tit
from ass to ass
like how you love
sneaking up behind me
and tossing my salad

 

 

 

 

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Poem Remix of Untitled Poem by Poet who May Not Even Exist #Poem #LPRTG

hey, traveler!

write on bits
of torn paper
place in each
favorite library
between the sheets
naked and revealed
like an author
in a book store
perhaps someone
will open the pages
in Mumbai, or Strasbourg,
or an underground mall
in Seoul
wonder where this magical
ticker tape came from
machine in China? latrine in Bangladesh?
sweat shop in una hacienda en Mexico
political referendum in Kathmandu
criminal apprehended in a Chateau in West Bordeaux
extradited to Moscú
with nothing but a portmanteau
slung on his back
filled with toy
zedonks
milking each other
in this literotica
playing harmonica
squeezing titty
teat-a-teat
tête-à-tête
until the glorious white ink
splashes, sprays, spooges
the tiny bits
of paper
this unlined moleskin
now has lines
not on the page
not in the library
not on this planet
but in your mind’s eye
that infinite ticker tape parade
sprinkling all over
the multiverse
word by word
letter by letter
serif sans serif

Please Share if You Enjoyed!

Rosetta Stone / Crypt Key

Definitions of portmanteau:
noun: a large travelling bag made of stiff leather
noun: a new word formed by joining two others and combining their meanings
Example: “`motel’ is a portmanteau word made by combining `motor’ and `hotel'”

*zedonk, from zebra and donkey (progeny of)
*literotica, from literature and erotica

 

A couple of notes about writing poetry

Moctezuma's SMUTPUNK'd abs is a poet for hire

Good Morning, Pulp Army!

I’m jetlagged, up early with plans to work out brutally with a friend but it’s raining in New York City, so that’s cancelled. I should write, but I’m too foggy yet hyped up and just don’t feel like it. I’ll probably troll FB and make snide comments on lots of shit that irritates me (well, everything) and remix poems that drive me up a wall. Am I a dick?

In related news, if you troll my site you will see that I often hate my own poems. One of my professors once told me that Anne Sexton used to read her poems publicly with a pencil in her hand and cross stuff out and rearrange things as she read out loud. I think the poetic soul is restless, unsatisfied, and just generally surly. Mine is. The thing that seems to be constantly out of whack and even changing as the world grows and the universe reconsiders everything and nothing and cares deeply and apathetically is the rhythm. Rhythm, rhythm, rhythm. They say when buying a house or learning how to throw a fastball “location, location, location.” Well, I say two main things to myself when writing: one, “so what?” and two, “rhythm, rhythm, rhythm!”

Personally, I think writing poetry makes my prose flow better and activates it. It gives it energy and sizzle. I mean we write to entertain. Who wants flat and boring? I mean, outside of FB (teehee). I’m not sure if writing prose helps my poetry. Probably not. I think the only thing that would help my poetry is electric shock therapy, but I guess I’m not much of an artist because I’m not willing to make that kind of sacrifice.

Snap, Crackle, Art by MJ (week 5 and 6 post)

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Snap, Crackle, Art by MJ (for Nu Romantics)

$.

Salvador Dali

Week Five (5) of #SnapCrackleArtByMJ has to veer off the kitschy poparttramdressedas-train and get on a proper Dali locomotive for a moment. While at the Dali Theater-Museum in Figueres, Catalonia, Spain, I took a photo through a looking glass of the Mae West room. A few weeks ago I posted that Mae West photo. That was a photo I took from the internet. This time it’s my photo with my own hands. I think you’ll enjoy it. If you click the above hashtag and scroll back on the Nu Romantics site, you will see Mae’s lips (and other lips). Here is Dali’s rendition of her, built with furniture and two paintings for eyes. To see the exhibit in Figueres, Catalonia, Spain I traveled by AVE (Alta Velocidad Espanol) to the sleepy little hometown of Dali. It’s a lovely town that was a pleasure to visit even if there wasn’t the amazing artist’s museum. The pre-museum cortado was delicious and afterwards my wife and enjoyed one of the best gazpachos I ever had. Unfortunately, salmorejo seems scarce in Catalunya (I adore that spelling of the word). If you’re like me, Spain is worth visiting just for the food (much as France is). However, Spain has Dali. Dali was a fierce nationalist, so much so that he openly supported the Franco dictatorship. Most journalists don’t dwell on this fact because they like to make art seem always made by liberals. Dali was a complex man, one who wasn’t even allowed access to his wife and muse Gala. By the end of their relationship, he bought her a house in the countryside, one which she had always wanted, and was only allowed visitation rights rarely and set up by formal request and acceptance via post. All of this Dali tension makes sense as you approach the red museum with eggs on the roof and a great big glass dome in the middle. His tomb is inside the museum and the whole place reeks of surrealism. To see the Mae West exhibit which I’d like to talk about as it links to a past post, I went into a dark room and then walked up a small staircase and stood under an elephant. I looked through a viewfinder between the super long legs of an elephant sculpture. The viewfinder fish-eyed the room to reveal a beautiful Mae West. See the photo below.

Joan Miro

I also had the pleasure of visiting the Miro Museum in Barcelona. Among many amazing features of Miro’s work, I was struck by one particular phase of his work were he burned the canvas that he painted. He didn’t burn it to smithereens, he just set it ablaze enough to poke a hole in it, and blacken certain edges, and char some of the colors. As I stood in awe of his work, I thought how that would translate into writing. I thought about If on a Winter’s Night a Traveler by the incomparable Italo Calvino (by far my favorite writer ever) and thought that his book about a manuscript gone wrong at the printer is about as close as anyone has come to simulating the burnt canvas of Joan Miro. In today’s ePublishing ecosystem, I think it can be done pretty well. I mean the digital file is certainly corruptable. What possible permutations are there? In Choose Your Own Kink SEXcapade, I tackle some of those possibilities, but a book I’ve been taking notes for before writing (Tentatively Titles If on a Mid-Summer’s Early-Evening a Prostitute) has more of a possibility of doing some justice to Miro’s vision. He made some incredible art that really stretched the boundary of what is art. Smutpunk owes Miro and incredible debt of gratitude. See photos below.

Questions

  • Whose work do you enjoy more, Dali or Miro?
  • What do you like about each artist?

Find more photos from my museum excursion in Catalunya and facebook.com/MoctezumaLXIX.

Archives of 

‘Snap, Crackle, Art’ by MJ 

on Nu Romantics

Week 1 at Nu Romantics – Mirror Post Hosted Online at smutpunk.me

Week 2 at Nu Romantics – Mirror Post Hosted Online at smutpunk.me

Week 3 at Nu Romantics – Mirror Post Hosted Online at moctezumajohnson.com

Week 4 at Nu Romantics – Mirror Post Hosted Online at smutpunk.me

Week 5 at Nu Romantics (featuring photos from the Dali Theatre-Museum in Figueres, Spain) – Mirror Post Hosted Online at moctezumajohnson.com

Week 6 at Nu Romantics (waiting for the Nu Romantic Folks *avg wait time so far = 12 hours) – Mirror Post Hosted Online at medium.com

List of All Snap, Crackle, Art by MJ posts on Nu Romantics

 

futa-dicksicle-stand

Click the Tongue to Get YOUR Tasty Treat!

 

Gallery:

Joan Miro

 

Salvador Dali

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Salvador-Dali-Erotica-Penis
salvador-dali-theatre-figueres-bust
salvador-dali

Week No. 3 – Snap, Crackle, Art [mirror of FB post on Nu Romantics]

eduardo-paolozzi-pop-art-smutpunk
I’m doing a weekly feature on Pop Art for the Nu Romantics. Click to see past posts. This week is week no. 3 – Snap, Crackle, Art featuring the work of Sir Eduardo Paolozzi
Yeah, it is the Fourth of July but since America certainly doesn’t deserve a Birthday this year I thought I’d keep the pop art cumming, spewing, frothing at the mouth even though it’s a holiday on paper for Americans which many Nu Romantics are although I’d dare them to explain basic US law to me. Anyways, I mean, what’s life without routine? What’s an MJ post without digression and misdirection. So last week was lips, I’ll include some $th (stet) of July lips for shits and giggles. Then, I’ll get into the murky alligator infested waters of Week Three featuring Eduardo Paolozzo (because why not feature a Brit who was born in Scotland of Italian parents on American Blow-Your-Fingers-Off-Your-Hand and Believe-some-BS-stories-about-Flagmaking Day).
🛶

Now personally, I find these Eduardo Paolozzi pieces eerily prophetic about the mess we are in right now in 2017 kind of at a halfway purgatory between cave paintings and technology. I mean, we have iPhones and NASA yet most people use their phones to read fake news and get their fifteen minutes of fame cut into 7 second bites they accrue daily and poor NASA just this week had to debunk an Alien Child Slave Colony on Mars. So, the more we’ve progressed, the more we are grunting and stenciling our names into the rock while not able to decipher shadow from corporeal reality.
🍱

Check out the artwork below and answer the three questions, if you feel daring, sexy, and a little lonely on the side:
🏟️
  1. What do these pop art pieces speak to? Did Eduardo predict the world being owned and controlled by Amazon and other algorithms? Did he foresee our inability to discern truth from bullshit? As you know, the motto of 2017 is “Bullshit is Truth, Truth Bullshit”
  2. Do you like the art? What does it remind you of?
  3. Are these pieces romantic? sarcastic? or something else?
  4. Do you believe there’s a Child Slave Colony on Mars
🤣
PERSONAL SIDE NOTE: I get a kick out of indie authors bitching that Amazon didn’t approve a cover or something as if Amazon is a bunch of old ladies knitting around a campfire. The indie authors invariably get angry that “amazon didn’t even respond.” Like in the artwork of Paolozzi, the whole machine is run by algorithms and computers and patterns and patterns and patterns. If you ask me, wrestling with an algorithm is an exercise in futility.
☢️
FUN FACT: Like many Italians in English-speaking countries during WWII, Paolozzi was held at an internment camp.
↘️
Artwork Credit:
Each piece is by Eduardo Paolozzi except the lips (unknown artist)
 
#PopArt #SnapCrackleArtbyMJ #smutpunk | Week No. 3 – Snap, Crackle, Art
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eduardo-paolozzi-pop-art-smutpunk

 

See more Pop Art from my Pinterest

 


The Missive in History and Historical Fiction by Bianca M. Schwarz | Guest Post

The Missive in History and Historical Fiction by Bianca M. Schwarz | Guest Post

 

Introduction by MJ:

After reading A Thing of Beauty by Bianca, I thought to myself how many letters Sir Henry had written and thought that was one of the best touches of the book. I thought who better to ask than Bianca herself to write a little bit about their usage in the novel and in historical fiction in general. Read her post below to learn more about letters in history. Enjoy this awesome guest post from a knowledgeable writer. 

 

As far back as the ancient Egyptians, the missive, and its grown up brother, the letter, have been the primary form of non verbal communication to those lucky enough to be able to read and write. Even the uneducated sent missives with the help of the town scribe, a man revered for his knowledge and integrity. The missive could be used to invite ones mother in law for dinner, conduct ones business, and to maintain a scientific and/or philosophical discourse between intellectuals. Written messages relayed military orders, and even the communication of state secrets was done through letters. Friendships, even love affairs, were built and maintained via written correspondence, and some famous letters have even been compiled into books. The very fabric of society relied on the missive.

The 18th and 19th Century are considered the heyday of the letter. Not only had literacy increased dramatically with the wide availability of books and newspapers following the invention of the printing press, but by then there were established mail carriers on roads and shipping lanes,  ensuring prompt and safe delivery. In short, the missive, or letter, was the established form of communication between two parties separated by physical distance before the invention of the telegraph.

It follows, that letters and missives feature prominently in historical fiction. My character, Henry, uses letters to communicate with the stewards of his four estates, and his daughter who lives with his cousins family. He is also no stranger to the importance of secrecy, as it pertains to government communications. He was instrumental in creating a safe letter delivery system from London to high command on the Peninsula during the Napoleonic Wars. Correspondence is of great importance to him, since it is the only way for him to stay in control of his affairs. He spends a considerable amount of time on tending his personal and professional relationships via the letters he writes, and the brief notes he pens, communicate his needs and wants to his associates.

The writing and receiving of letters was also governed by rules of curtsy. If you received a letter from someone socially placed above yourself, it was considered extremely rude not to acknowledge the receipt of the missive by penning an answer. In my story, The Pearl, in the anthology Déjà You, when Aunt Milly doesn’t receive an answer to the letters she wrote to her young estranged relative, she grows suspicious and sends her nephew to investigate. In my upcoming novel, She Walks In Beauty, a part of the mystery is unraveled thanks to the unlikely tone of a missive and the post mark on it.

As a writer, I often use surviving letters written during the time my stories are set as inspiration and source material. These missives are now historical documents, providing a rare glimpse into how people actually spoke and lived at the time. But perhaps the most valuable thing you can glimpse from these letters, are the attitudes of the authors. The conflict in most of my stories arises from the gap between my characters needs and wants, and the societal restrictions placed upon them.

Today we have the telephone, text messages, and emails. But in essence it is all communication; the only real difference between a letter and an email is the speed and manner of its delivery.

Happy ThighHigh Thursday! #ThighHighThursday #LPRTG #smutpunk

ThighHighThursday-Thong

Happy Thong & ThighHigh Thursday!

Step inside the anus for more free thong fun.

^.^

latina-with-fine-ass

 

 

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If you want to full size a certain image that won’t enlarge, let me know in the comments. Thanks.

How to Convince Your Girlfriend/Wife/Other to take a Facial #SexTips #LPRTG

sex-tips-facial-convince-your-girlfriend-wife

 Another Installment from the Instructional Series

“The Facial” (aka How to Convince Your Girlfriend/Wife/Other to take a Facial)

The Wonderful Climax that lands on a Face

Stocks can be quite persuasive!

Stocks can be quite persuasive!

Giving your girlfriend/wife/one-night-stand-whore a facial is a very important and complex ritual that any true man must master. Every couple goes through this same routine: The guy isn’t happy until the girlfriend routinely takes his nut every morning, or evening, or whatever hour they agree upon, but many men let their girlfriends dictate. This is, of course, a big mistake. Some people go through all kinds of trouble to make their loved one, slave, or sex toy take nut-butter (see images). This is a waste of time and energy and it really shouldn’t be. Your efforts are needed elsewhere and a facial is your privileged that you should be tapping into. It really shouldn’t be too terribly long before your cum is hitting her nose and eyes if you follow some simple steps, such as coercing her with lore of moisturized skin, tempting her to conform with the regularity of which it’s done in all the popular porn movies, telling her she’ll be your princess, and if necessary (or if you just want) by telling her that you love her dearly.

The first thing is to remind her that choad is in fact very good for her skin and that she’s already putting it on her face after every shower when she uses all those haute couture products that she uses. Haute Couture cum is great! The next thing to remind her is that all the porn girls do it. You can easily show her a blowjob and cumshot compilation videos in abundance at slutload.com, or youjizz.com, or stupidwhoreseatmoctezumacum.com. She will probably enjoy watching the porn. If she doesn’t, you may have a lot of work to do convincing her and should probably consider buying some stocks (see images). If you do buy stocks, simply lock her in and go to work–end of story. After you come on her bound face, tell her what a dumb slut she is and photograph her and send to this blog. They love the humiliation; that will make her day. If none of these tips help, you’re going to have to ask her if she wants to be your princess. “Of course,” she’ll say and then you put a tiara on her head and jizz all over it and her hair and her face. Also, you probably need to tell her that you love her and be very gentle with her. She may not be ready for a facial for whatever reason. Don’t feel too shy to beg her to take your load. If begging gets her to kneel and be your cum target you should feel like a stud. Also, if she begrudgingly kneels and lets the semen splatter her then you must either photograph it for posterity–because it will be a long time till the next one, if there is ever a next one–or you should immediately call her a stupid cum dump just to see the horror on her face.

Part of the Instructional Series by Moctezuma Johnson

Remember that no slut, err girl, is born ready to take a facial but they are all willing to learn to love it. The onus is on you, dudes. You have to work her into becoming your personal cumpig little by little. That said, you can surely convince her and feel like a real man. Girls will do all kinds of kinky shit for the man they love. Don’t worry. Remember the death of the Alpha Man in modern society is leading to his resurgence.

Post your experiences below and ask me if there’s any other how-to that you need. Happy cum-shooting!

Epilogue:
Why is the facial so important?
Marking your lover with your seed is quite empowering for a number of reasons. Tantamount is that the visual side of sex is really important to men (as Callie Press says in Give Great Head). Seeing the cum on my girl’s face turns me on. Also, knowing that there’s no chance of pregnancy and the session is focused on pleasure and nothing more is hot. It gives a nasty feel to the encounter. And, as George Clinton says, “All that is good is nasty!”

Book Review: A Thing of Beauty by Bianca M. Schwarz

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A Thing of Beauty: The Sir Henry March Mysteries (Volume 1) by Bianca M. Schwarz

Book Review by Moctezuma Johnson

I had never read a historical romance before and found it to be a daunting task. It took me a while to get accustomed to the pacing of the novel but luckily Bianca can really write well. The grammar is sound and the writing is highly polished. Little by little she pulled me into her world. The book starts off somewhere in England before the invention of the telegraph and slowly builds around a rich gent and a pretty woman he finds beaten at the curb. The tone is way more suited to literature than genre fiction, at least in the beginning. The tone is slow and meaningful, not the fast paced superficial prose of much contemporary Erotica. Bianca has done her homework and has the sound of the English spoken in that time period with detail paid to the different accents of the different classes. The first half of the book follows as a period piece giving you the feel of the day with a love story of Henry and Eliza. The second half has a plot about an old enemy that they try to catch in the act of torturing young girls. One demerit for me was the attitude of the novel toward which sexual deviances are acceptable and which are evil wasn’t made clear to me. It was assumed the reader would consider some men good and others bad, but I am not so easily convinced. I wished there was more discussion on the subject.

Also worth thinking about and discussing is the style of prose. It’s slow and languid. My guess is that fans of historical fiction will really enjoy the attention to detail and appreciate that Bianca took the time to install a thorough plot. Personally I wish the plot came into prevalence a bit earlier but do applaud the overall structure. Admittedly I don’t usually read historical romance fiction, so i suspect this probably means this was built smarter than I’ve even realized. Overall, The dialogue was quite well done even though Henry didn’t always speak like a man. Still, the dialogue was true to its time with a smattering of old words like phaeton, serviette, and curricle. The ending was really well done. I don’t usually like when plots are neatly tied up but in this case it was like a 1000 piece puzzle had slipped into place. Pretty cool.


Dick Rating:
 I can’t really give it too many dicks up because I’m not sure it’s even erotica. It’s a historical romance with an erotic element between two characters and some sexual deviations used to create villains not sexual satisfaction for the reader. I guess I’d give it one dick of two dicks up.

Literary Value: A Tale of Two Titties and Some Dicks out of a Tale of Two Cities.

Overall Score: 4.5 out of 5 stars. The story is well worth reading!

 

 

Learn More about Bianca | Book Review: A Thing of Beauty by Bianca M. Schwarz | Find other Reviews by MJ | Learn More about MJ

the Big Tit Looms

the Big Tit Looms 

the big tit looms
like an avalanche
about to stop the galaxy
from drinking coffee
late each night
under buzzing neon signs
that sprinkle the street
like sprinkles on ice cream
like Montgomery Bumps
on the big areola

the big tit looms
once tasted
like a mothership
if one of its dicks go astray
the big tit zaps
a sizzling jealousy laser
at other big tits